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for Human Development & Behavioural Therapy

NLP (Neuro Linguistic Programming) - Hypnosis - Cognitive Behavioural Therapy; Personalized Hypno-Coaching & Hypno-Therapy
Certified NLP Master Practitioners (USA); Advanced Neurolinguistic Hypnotherapist (USA); Advanced 5PATH Hypnotherapist (USA)
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Saturday, December 12, 2015
4 pm to 7 pm
To register - click EVENTS page


NLP & Hypnosis for Public Speaking Power

I used to suffer from social phobia, inferioirty complex, self-limiting beliefs, inhibitions and ofcourse,
be totally terrified of public speaking - now it's natural and fun.

Dry mouth, fast heart, sweaty palms, blank mind - yeah I've been there! It's easy to fear public speaking.
But I was never just content with overcoming fear. I wanted to be a great speaker.
What I needed was a way of calming down and applying simple techniques and strategies to talk like a pro.

When I had learned to relax (more of that later) I learned and applied the following four steps.

1.     Reassure your audience - they need to know, you know your stuff and you are human!

2.     Hook them by being interesting and relevant. Tell them why, what you are saying, is relevant to them.

3.     Inspire them by giving them information and ways of seeing, that are new and applicable.

4.     Leave them on a high by telling a story that encapsulates your central message.

How do you become confident enough to apply the four steps?

Here are some tips - some of which are practical, some of which are to do with the way you think about
your public presentations and also how you can start to change the way you feel about them.

Tip One

Breathe your way to calm. When you breathe out you relax that's why people sigh when they're stressed.

Breathing in without breathing out causes hyperventilation and worsens anxiety. Just before your speech take
five minutes breathing in to the count of seven and out to the count of eleven (quick count-not seconds!).
On the out breath hold it a second before breathing in again. This will produce quick and lasting calm.
Remember, extending the out breath calms you down.

Tip Two

You have a responsibility as the presenter but relax you don't carry all the responsibility.
Presenting is a team effort. Audiences are responsible for politeness, extending their attention and
attempting to learn. It's not all you-it's a meeting of two halves. Never mind how they judge you.
How do you judge them?

Tip Three

Use metaphor and stories. We all experience life metaphorically. The most technical, logical person spends
at least two hours a night dreaming! Talk detail if necessary but present patterns with metaphors. Folk from
4 to 104 love stories. Use them.

Tip four

Captivate attention by using words that evoke all the senses. Describe how things look, sound, feel, smell
and taste. Paint pictures and sensations in their minds with your words.

Tip Five

Vary your voice tonality and speed of delivery. Keep them alert and engaged. Convey energy when need be
and slow down when you need to 'draw them in close.' You are the conductor to their orchestra. And pepper
your talk with humour. Your willingness to be funny shows personal confidence and confidence is contagious.

Tip Six

Tell them what they are going to get, later what they are currently getting and then what they have got from you.
Sell your sizzle!

Tip Seven

Watch and learn from other great speakers until compelling, relaxed speaking is a part of you.

Rehearse positively. You need to rehearse how you are going to feel as well as what you are going to
present. Don't think about your forthcoming presentation whilst feeling nervous as this creates an
instinctive association between fear and presenting. This natural negative self-hypnosis is very common with
nervous speakers.

Hypnotically rehearse your speech whilst feeling relaxed. This produces the right 'blueprint' in your mind.
In fact when you do this enough times it actually becomes hard to be nervous!

All great speakers know how to use great self-hypnotic rehearsal. Hypnosis changes attitudes and can
bring emotion under control. I used hypnosis, to change my instincts around public speaking. Now I just
can't get nervous whether it's 50 or 500 people. The world needs great communicators. Go for it!


When you master and incorporate NLP and Hypnosis skills in your public speaking you will surely
make a fantastic impression and mesmerize audiences anywhere and everywhere you go.
Storytelling can be a powerful attention grabber
Being a good storyteller can be profitable for you. It will make you immensely popular with people in business and 
social circles. People are more likely to remember your points and move in your direction if the points are supported with 
stories. These don't have to be long stories either. Any personal anecdote is really a story. Only use stories if you enjoy 
telling them. There is too much invested to do a boring or bad job of it. If you don't have a good time telling the story, your 
audience will probably be bored. Even if you acquire all the right techniques, your stories will still flop if you don't tell them 
with a great amount of enthusiasm.If you are contagiously enthusiastic about your topic and let it show, many of your errors 
will go unnoticed. It's the sameway with storytelling and presenting in general. Your enthusiasm can make or break your 
overall performance.When you come across a story in a book, or when you have a personal incident you think will make a 
good story, ask yourself the following questions: 
  1.  Is it clean?
  2. Can I use it in a professional presentation to make a point?
  3. What point does it illustrate?                  
  4. What other points does it illustrate?                  
  5. What should I say to lead into the story?                  
  6. What should I say following the story?                  
  7. Where should I put it in my presentation?                  
  8. Is it better than something I am already using?
Just thinking about the answers to the above questions will make your storytelling better. Many presenters just slap 
any old story into their presentation, any old place, because they like the story. That is not the way to do it.
The following list of Do's, Don'ts, Rules, and Tricks is meant to break the important points about storytelling into 
digestible chunks. Each point is very important. Don't try to implement all these tips at once. You'll never remember 
the details of your story. Pick one or two to practice until they become ingrained. Then add another tip to make the 
story even better. Note: These points are not in order of importance.
1.       Use stories to illustrate points and state the point in addition to telling the story. 
2.       Always make your story relevant to the subject at hand. 
3.       Select stories to match the intelligence, experience, occupation, and age of the audience as well as the nature 
of the occasion. You don't want to talk over the heads of the audience members and you don't want to bore them 
with stories that are too simple. 
4.       Space stories at intervals to provide a change of pace and to reemphasize your message. 
5.       Tell about your troubles, stupidity, or ignorance. People like you when you use self-effacing humor because they 
see themselves mirrored in your weaknesses.                  
6.       Eliminate inconsequential detail. 
7.       Use the fewest number of words that convey the message in an interesting fashion. Writing the story out will help
     you see words that can be eliminated without hurting the story.                  
8.       Keep your humorous stories short. The size of the laugh is inversely proportional to the number of words used to get to 
the punchline. Rule: The longer the story, the funnier it must be. You must make jokes and humorous stories believable up to 
a point. Use factual, specific details that the audience can relate to, i.e., say the brand name like "Lots-o-Suds" rather than a 
laundry detergent. The more truthful and specific the story sounds the more your audience will get caught up in what you say.                  
9.       Specify the location of a joke or story. If your story takes place in a restaurant say, "I was at Jerry's Sub Shop in Rockville, 
Maryland, the other day." This gives the audience something concrete to think about, which makes them more involved mentally.                  

     When crafting a story, use people, places, and things the audience knows. When the audience is familiar with the elements

10.   in your story, they will become even more involved. As soon as you mention the company cafeteria, their minds race to the cafeteria 
to meet you and find out what happens. However, don't use humor that is too inside. Only a few people will understand it.                  
11.   Emphasize the adjectives and verbs in your stories to make them sound more interesting. Try it. Look around where you are right 
now and describe anything you want. Really put punch behind the adjectives and verbs and see how your description comes to life. Use 
specific and interesting verbs and adjectives. Say I was exhausted, not I was tired. Say, her head was nodding and drooping, not her 
head was down.                  
12.   Learn your stories. In a normal speech if you forget the exact thing you wanted to say, you can improvise and go on. 
But if you leave out an important detail in a story or if you accidentally give away the climax too soon, you have a mess 
on your hands. I tell a story at least 30 times in private before I'll test it in front of an audience.                  
13.   Use true facts from your own life. This makes it easier for you to tell the story because you lived it and 
you can learn it faster too. Also, someone else can't steal your story as easily if all the facts have to do with your life.                  
14.   Use appropriate emotional language to hook the listener.
15.   Construct a humorous story so that it concludes abruptly with a climax word. Don't utter another syllable or 
sound after this climax word. You might squelch the laughter you worked so hard to get. Exception: Some stories 
get laughter all along the way.                  
16.   Work out different lengths of the same story to fit different time segments. Remember: Don't memorize your 
stories word-for-word. This way you won't feel forced to say every word, every time you tell the story. You can change 
the length of the  story easily by adding or subtracting detail. Super Trick: Have a quotation ready that makes the 
same point as your story. If your time is shortened, you can cut out a story and replace it with a quote.                  
17.   Slant your story to the intended audience. When telling a story to a group of executives you would probably 
want to use different language and emphasis than if you were telling the same story to a group of secretaries. 
Change nonessential elements of the story to make a better connection.                  
18.   Use terms like Imagine this…, Have you ever had an experience where . . .Let me take you with me to . . . 
to draw the audience into your stories.                  
1.       When setting up a story, don't say the words funny, reminds me of, or story. These words are so overused they 
alert the audience that a story is coming. This causes audience members to resist your story rather than get caught 
up in your story. They say in essence, Let's see you make me laugh, or OK here comes another story. 
2.       Don't say, I heard a good one the other day for the same reason you don't say it reminds me of. The audience will resist and 
challenge you to make them laugh.                  
3.       Never say, I don't know if I should tell this one. If there is any doubt whatsoever that a story is not appropriate 
for a particular group, leave it out.  
Better ways to set up a story:
The best way to start a story is to get right into it. You should be into the story before anyone realizes it is a story. 
That way they are already deeply involved and don't have time to resist. You could say:                  
    There was this man . . .                  
    On the flight here . . . 
Don't say, A funny thing happened on the way to the meeting today.                  
    Driving in this morning . . .                  
    In the cab today . . .                  
    I was talking with . . .                  
    Let me take you back . . ., Come with me . . ., Imagine . . ., Visualize  this .. . 
These are a little different because they do alert the audience that a story is coming, but they get them so involved 
emotionally that any resistance is counteracted.
When getting out of a story:
Never say, "But seriously folks". If it was a funny story you don't have to say, "Hey Stupid! That was a joke". 
It also implies you were lying.                  
To exit a story:
Don't say anything about it being over. Just make a slight change in delivery, tone, rate, expression, etc., and go on.  
Here Are Some More Don'ts:
     Don't use too many stories on the same topic. Each successive one will lose impact.                  
     Tell a story where you are the hero. If you are the hero, make it appear that it was dumb luck that made you so 
     (self-effacing humor). 
    If you are a bonafide hero, forget what I just said, but make sure you add a healthy dose of humility for best connection 
    with the audience.                  
    Don't use terms foreign to the experience of the audience.                  
    Don't die of printed page poison. Written stories must be changed to be recited aloud. When you find a story that 
    you like in a reference book, you cannot say it exactly as it is written or you will sound stupid. You must knock out
     the he said's and she said's.  
Tricks to use: 
Look in different directions to indicate different characters. The audience will associate a stage right or stage left look with 
the different character.                  
Use above trick along with changing your voice tone to indicate different characters.                  
Do what the written story says. If it says Joe cleared  his  throat, you clear your throat at that point in the story.                  
Don't give a history lesson when telling a humorous story. Put yourself into the story to make it believable. Fake truth is essential 
to humor even if story is totally false.                  
The exception to the need for fake truth is when you are telling an exaggeration. Then anything goes.                  
I had a terrible day at the beach. I came home with 14 harpoon wounds.                  
To use that line, it doesn't matter if you've ever been to the beach in your life.
It's just a funny line teasing yourself about being large (like a whale). 
Don't try to come off as an expert if you took a whirlwind tour of someplace. 
Extra Special Bonus Genius Technique:
Split your story. Start a story near or at the beginning of your talk, but don't finish it. Build suspense by cutting off the story at a 
key point or just before the climactic finish. This builds anticipation. Finish the story at the end of your talk.
 If you incorporate even a small percentage of the above tips, your storytelling and value as a presenter will increase dramatically.
  Why use humour in your presentations

Why should I bother using humor in my presentations? Can't I just deliver my information and sit down? You sure can and that's what most people do. The problem is that most people are not effective presenters. They might be experts in their field and be able to

recite hours and hours of information on their topic, but is that effective? No. An effective presentation is one that achieves its purpose, whatever that may be.


I don't think that most presenters define their purpose clearly even to themselves. You must ask yourself: Why am I here? What do I want to accomplish? Am I here to sell something? Am I here to motivate? Am I here to persuade? Am I here to get votes? What do I want the audience to take home with them when I'm done? Once you've answered these questions I can tell you how and why humour and many other professional techniques will help you achieve your goals. But if you don't even know why you are there, then I can't help you.


Humor has gone from being an admirable part of a leader's character to a mandatory one. A survey of top executives who earned more than $250,000 per year was conducted by a large executive search firm. The survey found that these executives believed their communication skills were the  number one factor that carried them to the top. Mastering the use of humor and other high-explosion techniques puts a fine polish on those skills which can help propel you to the top more quickly.


Using humor does the following for you:


HELPS YOU CONNECT WITH THE AUDIENCE. What audience is going to listen to you if they don't feel you are one of them?                 

MAKES YOU MORE LIKEABLE. The more an audience likes you, the more they will be likely to agree with your ideas.                 

AROUSES INTEREST. Many of you speak to audiences that don't even want to be there. Humor can help you gain their interest.                  

KEEPS ATTENTION. Grabbing interest at the beginning of a presentation is not enough to carry you to the end. You must keep the attention of the audience all the way. Humor and other presentation devices placed appropriately will help you do this.                   

HELPS EMPHASIZE POINTS AND IDEAS. Anyone who has ever taken a simple speaking course knows that you must hit your audience on the head with your point over and over before they get it. Humor is one of the hammers you can use.                  

DISARMS HOSTILITY. Nonfrivolous humor can be used to take the edge off audiences that are clearly against you.                  

REDUCES RELATIVE STATUS. Many of you are what I call the "big-shots" of your organization. Your position as boss creates a big barrier to listening. Making a little fun of yourself (self-effacing humor) will do wonders for opening lines of communication.                 

OVERCOMES OVERLY FLATTERING INTRODUCTIONS. Introducers come in all quality levels. If you get one that makes you sound like God, it will create expectations in the audience that you couldn't possibly live up to. Humor can neutralize that problem instantly.                 

GETS YOUR POINT ACROSS WITHOUT CREATING HOSTILITY. Sometimes you have to deliver tough negative messages. The careful use of humor can help you do your dastardly deed without creating unnecessary anger.                 

HELPS RELATE FACTS AND FIGURES. A friend of mine says, "I don't want to bore you with sadistics (see Malaprops )." Technical and financial presenters must be especially careful to spice-up long lists of numbers and generally dry material. You must keep in mind that most people in your audience are not as passionate about your subject as you are or they would be up in front of the group. Think from the audience's point of view and do whatever it takes to break up boring material so you don't lose your audience

totally. Even subtle humor can help the audience respond positively to information that could be considered boring."                 

MAKES A POSITIVE IMPRESSION. Laughter and good humor create bonds. Even if the audience members don't like you, they will like you better if you can make them laugh or smile and they will leave with better thoughts of you.                   

SHOWS THAT YOU DON'T TAKE YOURSELF TOO SERIOUSLY. The old saying goes, "If you take yourself too seriously, no one else will." You don't want to be known as a stuffed shirt. If you can laugh a little bit at yourself at the right times, your audience can laugh with you and not at you.                 

HELPS PAINT PICTURES IN THE AUDIENCE'S MIND. The pictures humorous storytellers can paint are what people remember, not the words.                 

MAKES INFORMATION MORE MEMORABLE. Joyce Saltman, a college professor and well-known speaker in the health care field, did exhaustive research for her 1995 doctoral dissertation Humor in Adult Learning. She  concluded that "Most researchers agreed that humor generally aided in the retention of materials as well as to the enjoyment of the presentation of the information."                 

LIGHTENS UP HEAVY MATERIAL. Appropriate humor added to heavy, serious material gives the audience a few seconds to relax. Even Shakespeare employed this device, called "comic relief," extensively to provide distraction or offer respite from the serious events of a tragedy. 

YOU WILL BE ASKED BACK. If you succeed in your original purpose for making your presentation, you may be asked back. If you also make the audience feel really good by entertaining them at the same time, your chances of being asked back will be much higher.                 

YOU WILL GET HIGHER EVALUATIONS OR MORE SALES. If you make the audience feel good, they will like you better and reflect that in your evaluation scores or buy more and more often from you.                 

YOU WILL MAKE MORE MONEY. If you are a professional presenter, you will be booked more and your fees will rise. If you present as part of your job, then read the next item carefully.                 

YOU WILL BE MORE PROMOTABLE. Having and conveying a sense of humor is on virtually everyone's list of top leadership skills. A humorous and engaging presentation style will push you up the ladder where good communications skills are a must.                 

IF IT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR POPES AND PRESIDENTS, IT'S GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME. I don't know about the pope, but I do know that all modern-day presidents are coached extensively on the use of appropriate humor for many of the reasons stated above.                 

YOU WILL MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY. This is my favorite benefit. I get great satisfaction from knowing that I have brightened someone else's life. I had an executive come up to me after one of my training seminars and say, "You opened up a whole new world for me." I almost cried right on the spot. I'll never forget it.



Why do professional presentations turn out to be boring and dry
Are you ready for a sweeping generalization? Well here it is. Technical and financial information can be boring and dry. 
There, I said it. Technical and financial presenters need to be aware of this fact more than anyone. The good thing is that 
they don't have to go through too much training or coaching to dramatically increase their effectiveness. A survey of the faculty 
of engineering schools showed that 15% of an engineer's future success depends upon engineering skills, while 85% depends 
upon communication skills. The problem is that most engineering schools don't emphasize communication skills. There are so 
many numbers and equations flying around that no one worries too much about whether someone can explain them or not. 
At conferences and seminars, many technical presenters are picked on the basis of their research. Many of them 
hate presenting or even being with people. That is why they chose a profession that hides them away in a lab. Some 
brilliant technical people think the audience just isn't smart enough to understand their concepts. They take no responsibility 
at all for making their information understandable and interesting. They think it's "Mickey Mouse" for them to try to be interesting.
Why are most technical presenters horrendously boring to a general audience? The technical professions train people to 
look for detail. If a detail is missed, the whole project falls apart. A techie once told me, "When I'm talking to you or to an
audience, I am carefully building a bridge in my mind. I'm going to tell you about every part of that bridge whether you want 
to hear it or not." That might be OK for a technical audience that has to go out and build the same bridge, but it is "Greek and 
Latin" to an audience who is only interested in finding out where the bridge is going. Was that techie at fault? Not really. He was 
just applying the learning template he lived by all the way through school and technical college. 
To help us understand how to be successful in delivering technical information I have the following suggestions:
(1) Audience expectations:
With the world of technology changing at such a rapid pace, it's not surprising that more and more presentations are 
being geared towards the technological side of learning, or the "hard skills" types of programs. The nature and content 
of these programs has to be different from the "soft skills" or motivational programs because the needs and the expectations 
of the audience are different. The attendees look upon the time spent as a learning investment. They expect high content to 
be delivered in an understandable and usable manner during the allocated times.
(2) Humour is entertaining:
Humour, as an end in itself, will not be appreciated. It's best to use humor that is specific to the discipline and that will 
probably only be understood and/or appreciated by the attendees who have an intimate knowledge of the topic. 
(General humor will be considered as time wasting and not relevant to the topic.)
(3) Story-telling is engaging:
Stories are another good type of humor. Stories to which the attendees can directly relate, and ones that demonstrate 
practical methodologies of what to do or what to avoid, will assist the attendees in  empathizing with the information 
being taught. On the other hand, typical "shaggy dog" stories and tales that would normally bring the audience to tears or 
result in a standing ovation will fall flat when addressing a technical audience.
(4) Slide-show is exciting:
Most technical session attendees are used to receiving information through a highly structured and organized means. 
They generally appreciate a bulleted outline of what is to be covered and expect the presenter to cover all of the points 
promised in a timely and expeditious manner. Time will become critical because of the volume of information to be delivered 
without leaving out anything important.
(5) Time is precious:
Always evaluate your material for flow and time allocation and remember that the audience has no idea of what you leave out, 
as long as you address each point promised to some degree. If you are concerned about having too much material for the 
time allocated, seriously consider creating a detailed handout with all of the relevant information and only address the 
spots of critical concern in the presentation.
(6) Handout is educational:
Technical audiences always appreciate having a written document with lots of details that they can refer to later.
As with every other learning situation, your presentation should be geared to the needs of the participants.
The most important characteristic to consider for a one-to-three-hour session is the demographics of your participants.
Demographics are not just age, sex, income, and education, although these may be very important to know.
You also want to know the learners' level of knowledge about the subject, their problems and needs, and how they are going
to use the information you are giving them.
Stage Fright is good - Makes you better looking too
Before you learn how to deliver your lines, it is important to be ready to deliver your lines. Stage fright is a phenomenon that you must learn to control. Actually, stage fright isn't the most accurate term for the nervousness that occurs when considering a speaking engagement. In fact, most of the fear occurs before you step on-stage. Once you're up there, it usually goes away. Try to think of stage fright in a positive way. Fear is your friend. It makes your reflexes sharper. It heightens your energy, adds a sparkle to your eye, and color to your cheeks. When you are nervous about speaking you are more conscious of your posture and breathing. With all those good side effects you will actually look healthier and more physically attractive. Many of the top performers in the world get stage fright so you are in good company. Stage fright may come and go or diminish, but it usually does not vanish permanently. You must concentrate on getting the feeling out in the open, into perspective and under control. Remember Nobody ever died from stage fright. But, according to surveys, many people would rather die than give a speech. If that applies to you, try out some of the strategies in this section to help get yourself under control. Realize that you may never overcome stage fright, but you can learn to control it, and use it to your advantage
Some of the physiological symptoms of Stage fright:
    Dry mouth

    Tight throat

    Sweaty hands

    Cold hands

    Shaky hands


    Fast pulse

    Shaky knees

    Trembling lips

    Here are some easy to implement strategies for reducing your stage fright. Not everyone reacts the same and
    there is no universal fix
    Don't try to use all these fixes at once. Pick out items from this list and try them out until you find the right
    combination for you

Positive and Creative Visualization strategies that can be used anytime:
    Concentrate on how good you are

    Pretend you are just chatting with a group of friends

    Close your eyes and imagine the audience listening, laughing, and applauding

    Remember happy moments from your past

    Think about your love for and desire to help the audience

    Picture the audience in their underwear

Strategies to be adopted well before the presentation:
    Be extremely well prepared

    Join public speaking club for extra practice

    Get coaching in individual or group presentation skills

    Listen to music

    Read a poem

    Anticipate hard and easy questions


    Absolutely memorize your opening and closing statements so you can deliver it on autopilot if you have to

    Practice, practice, practice

    Get in shape

Strategies just before the presentation:
    Remember Stage fright usually goes away after you start. The tricky time is before you start
    Be in the room at least an hour early if possible to triple check everything

    Familiarize yourself with your surroundings

    Concentrate on searching for current and immediate things that are
    happening at the event that you can mention during your talk

    Get into conversation with people in the audience

    Yawn to relax your throat and stretch your facial muscles by tightening and loosening them

    Draw sketches of a new car you would like to have

    Build a cushion of time in the day so you are not rushed

    If your legs are trembling, lean on a table, sit down, or shift your legs

    Give yourself Positive Affirmations silently

    Take quick drinks of tepid water

    Double check your Audio/Video equipment
    Remember not to drink alcohol or coffee or tea with caffeine

    Concentrate on your ideas and how to dramatize them

    Listen to music
    Go somewhere private and warm up your voice, muscles, etc.

    Go to a mirror and check out how you look

    Breathe deeply, evenly, and slowly for several minutes

    Remember not to eat if you don't want to and never take tranquilizers or other such drugs to calm your nerves

Strategies during the presentation:
    If legs are trembling, lean on lectern /table or shift legs or move
    Try not to hold the microphone by hand in the first minute or better to use a clip-on wireless microphone

    If you find notes shake in your hands, use three-by-five cards instead

    Take quick drinks of tepid water

    Use eye contact. It will make you feel less isolated

    Look at the friendliest faces in the audience and smile or nod your head at them

    Use humour when appropriate to make the audience relax
Remember, nervousness doesn't show one-tenth as much as it feels. Before each presentation make a short list of the items
you think will make you feel better. Don't be afraid to experiment with different combinations. You never know which ones will work
best until you try. Rewrite them on a separate sheet and keep the sheet with you at all times so you can refer to it quickly when
the need arises.

Use these steps to control stage fright so it doesn't control you.




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